This goes for replying to emails, having the next word and in general all things done in haste.  It is the standard golden rule when it comes to response times to wait 24 hours when you have that fire within you of urgency to reply.   Generally a text , email, social post or something you have heard that has a condescending, derogatory, challenge provoking, passive aggressive, absolute untruth or just really button poking context will have us posture within for the instant defense to revert.

Again a great time to share a little story as i have precipitated like a torrential rainy day at times and almost instantly do i regret the hit send after its too late. (i now have my outlook mail set up to wait 1 minute in the outbox before transmission fully – these little things like forgetting to attach and attachment after crafting the most eloquent and professional letter, are the things that throw all else down the tubes when it comes to how others view the “hot to trots”.

Has anyone here mistakenly hit reply all when communicating very much intended for the sender and embarrassingly shared with an audience unintended? I will say I have  and also I have added my own CCs or BCC’s when wanting to throw someone under the bus or just make their words to me now privy to all.   Shameful right?  This is the retaliation energy that haste provokes and it can be nasty, especially if on the receiving side because it could be an email interworld war zone when two start the attacks in verbal unison towards one another. Who really wins in any of these circumstances?

I will tell you who-  it is the one who holds countenance and governs self control.  Waits and responds in a different mindframe with fresh outlook and clarity dispositioned.  Easier said than done right?  What about that troll that just called your brand or product out in front of thousands of other followers?  How can you just ho hum and regroup? 

Well firstly , remember that the action in doing the latter is acting on impulse so – we must practice self control.  So as i mentioned already – the press pause on things traditionally 24 hours is a great practice to start.  If you absolutely must engage, here is a good one – ask them if they have anything else to add. Okay sure it has a hint of sarcasm and passive aggressive undertones but try to position it genuinely like you are coming from that place of heart and listen, have them run the context until they run out of steam or recognize you’re above that behavior.   This is especially helpful practice when it;s an employee or other colleague that you are biting your tongue against.  If you are in a position of leadership, it is especially important to ask yourself why you wish to react the way your impulses are running.  Then ask yourself why again. The more you question yourself the more you can explore new ways of entertaining your impulses and that may change the way we decide to react. Either way, by the time you’ve done this – you will have not been reacting in haste or precipitation!