Bite your tongue, don’t engage! But it feels like I have too!

This mental and verbal struggle has always been tough for me.  Because I have always said what’s on my mind, overspoke, and reacted quickly. That’s exactly why I’ve started to govern my life with peace and mindfulness. And I now come equipped with verbal duct tape.

My son read a great book a few weeks ago involving a boy who shared the same problem with his words and thoughts. The boy in the story’s words would rumble in his tummy, grumble in his mind, and then erupt through his mouth like a volcano.

And if you bite your tongue what happens when your buttons get pushed?

If you bite your tongue, and your buttons get pushed, deploy the invisible answering machine. Here’s what I recommend:

  • Do not engage
  • Walk away
  • Set a mental busy tone

Of course, you can’t bite your tongue, and ignore situations or people forever. But I have seen the results in my answering machine methodology. In fact, it’s a lot easier it is to communicate after dust, words, opinions are settled.

Gone are the days when I could have the last word or form a rebuttal.   Sometimes you need to retaliate, no matter how right or wrong things are.  The one thing that has helped me lately with unnecessary back and forth and abrupt consequence of the tongue was patience.

apart from the smoking GIF

I would like to thank the voice in my head that’s pressing the record button on conversations best left on voice mail.  Now, this isn’t an “actual” voicemail. But it does do the trick mentally.   Like a recording, sometimes waiting leads to the best reply.

Hello, hello – anybody home?  Think, McFly! Think!

You know the expression:

Turning the other cheek

When you’re connected socially and have to turn your cheek, ear, mouth, eyes and senses to avoid conflicts it’s pretty unfair.  Although it’s not fair, it’s also doable.

Most importantly, if you want to poke the bears of your life, you might want to leave that on the answering machine of life.

Now, here’s a key lesson of everything you just read: never let your volcano erupt.

I will not hold myself liable for times when I slip.  The tongue does slip.

I have struggled with anxiety.  But I’m now able to process again with confidence, through conscious thought training and controlling the pace of my life.  These self-improvements, like everything, are a work in progress.